Philip Longes, a solicitor from Dorking was coerced into shaving his beloved 30 year old moustache to raise funds for Comic Relief. His donators gleefully watched as the moustache follicles fell. An anonymous friend reported that Philip felt "devastated and empty" after the ordeal.
|Philip fearfully awaits ordeal as moustache haters cackle in background|
|30 year old moustache gets the shave|
This incident merely highlights the plight of modern society and it's greedy need to constantly tear down historical landmarks. The donator's should've paid to keep the 30 year old national treasure and paid to restore it to past glory. What next? Let's smash the Pyramids to raise funds for homeless squirrels? They do look cute though!